Researching my story about bathrooms, I came across this wonderful page of dos and don’ts for shower enclosures. The advice has delightful appeal – it’s charming.
Here are some excerpts:
Towel Bar and Handle Warning
Towel bars and handles are not to be used as grab bars.
For many people, grab bars in showers are a great assistance for getting in and out of the tub or shower. However, if your tub or shower enclosure is equipped with a towel bar, you should not use it as a grab bar. It will not support your weight. Do not hang from it. Do not stand on it. If you use excessive force, it could snap off, shatter your shower door, send glass everywhere, or do goodness knows what. If you have small children who love to hang on things, and you are often heard to call them “my little monkeys” (in an affectionate way, of course), it’s probably a good idea to instruct them not to hang from the towel bar. However, your towels and washcloths should be quite happy hanging from the towel bars.
There is a lot of “goodness knows what” and “[xyz] can cause all sorts of trouble.” Not exactly quantifiable, but you get the picture, n’est-ce pas?
And for goodness sake…
Warning about Opening & Closing Your Shower Door
Do not use excessive force when opening & closing your Shower Enclosure.
All of us at some point get angry. Some people are physically strong, some are naturally aggressive. If you use excessive force when opening or closing your Shower Enclosure, you could shatter the glass. I mean, it is glass for goodness sake.
Er, yep.
This bit was really frustrating…
Glass Obscurity Warning
Make sure to consider all the important factors when selecting the obscurity level of your glass.
It’s expensive to change your glass after your shower enclosure is installed, so we recommend that you consider all the factors that could be important to you. Do you own a mountain cabin, and have a lovely view through the enclosure out the window? In that case you might consider clear glass to be your best option. Do you prefer a certain degree of privacy when showering? Perhaps an obscure pattern would be right for you. Is your shower enclosure the showpiece of your master bathroom? You might consider using Art Glass. And, of course, we all remember the gorilla story.
No we don’t! What gorilla story? If anyone knows, please tell me, because I’m dying of curiosity.
But the finish is the best of all, and left a big smile on my dial…
Warning to People who Fish
If you are cleaning fish in the shower, we recommend that you thoroughly remove all fish innards and sanitize your enclosure soon as you are finished. [ewww]
Not doing so can cause all sorts of trouble [my emphasis], especially if your have a significant other who is about to shower and doesn’t appreciate the fine aroma of freshly caught & cleaned fish.
Too right, mate, cos she just might wrap some of those innards around your neck and squeeze.
So, a bit of sage advice about looking after your shower enclosure. If you want to read the whole lot, go here.
Tags: humour, shower advice